This story is the first fanfic I ever wrote and posted online back in 2005. Until now, it’s only been available on my livejournaland AO3, but since it fits my February theme for reposting all my stuff, I’m finally bringing it to my journal.
When Jackie left for Chicago, Hyde knew he’d made a mistake, but going there to fix it made things even worse. Now his life is one long string of unwanted emotions–anger, hate, heartache, remorse, regret… love. Despite the pain, he knows he still loves her. But maybe that’s why it hurts so much.
Jackie screwed up. Steven was gone, and it was all her fault. She tries to go on with her life, but the ache in her chest just won’t go away. She knows she has to make things right; she’s just not sure Steven will want to hear her out. She knows she has to try, though, because she can’t live with herself knowing she hurt him so deeply.
18,809 words | [PG-13]
Chapter One: There Are Always Two Sides
Hyde pulled into the Forman driveway well past one in the morning and sat listening to the ticks and pops of the cooling engine. The whole drive home from Chicago he had fumed. He thought of every way he could possibly hurt Kelso and of every way that Jackie had hurt him. The pain was unbelievable. Hyde never knew a person could feel this way. Why would anyone want to be in love if this kind of hurt could happen?
The rage he’d built on the ride home mellowed as he crossed over the Point Place city limits. The anger that normally kept his other emotions in check faded, leaving an empty ache in his chest. For the first time since Bud left when he was a kid, Hyde felt like crying. He choked back the welling tears and remembered his Zen.
He tiptoed across the kitchen, glad it was late and everyone was in bed. The last thing he needed now was to hear Mrs. Forman tell him how sorry she was or listen to Donna lament about how much she would miss Forman. Hyde was too tired to deal with his friends—no matter how well-meaning they were. He crept down to his room, and slumping onto his cot, buried his face in his hands. He sighed. Every inch of his body hurt from the tension winding him into a tight knot. Read more…